What I wanna do before 40

Since para bloggers pada bikin2 blog post ttg ‘what to do before 30’ gara2 blognya Lia, and since I’m wayyyyy over 30, ya gue bikin gue punya before 40 loh. Sometimes I forgot umur gue berapa loh. Karena setelah menginjak umur 30, you just stop counting ur age wkwkwkwk..

Btw before that, gue mo cerita dikit. Bulan lalu gue balik dari retret di Melaka. This time our guest speaker adalah Ps. Jonathan David. To have him speak in our retreat itu bener2 an honour. Maybe most of u ga kenal ama yg namanya Jonathan David. But he is a great man of God. God uses him as an apostle and prophet, his ministry is more in building leaders and pastors around the world. Jadi makanya namanya jarang didenger kayak hamba2 Tuhan laen, yg seperti kaliber Joyce Meyer or Joel Oesteen. Dia ga pernah ngadain KKR or Crusade for thousands of people, yg biasanya dibuat oleh hamba2 Tuhan terkenal. He is more focused in building leaders n pastors. Lokasinya aja di Muar, Malaysia and I bet most of u ga pernah denger Muar itu dimana hehehe. But when he held his conferences, as many as 30 nations can attend. Pastors2 and leaders2 dari segala penjuru dunia pada dateng. Because his calling is to equip the leaders, what he receives from God, he shares them to the church leaders around the world, and then he sends them back to build their own respective churches. Yah namanya juga apostle/rasul.. hehehe.

Nah I’ve heard abt him since 7-8 years ago. But I only managed to come to his conference abt 4 years ago. Teaching nya bener2 dalem, sometimes keras and nemplak. Saya suka gaya beliau wkwkkwkw. I’ve been blessed so much by his teaching, so it was truly an honour to have him for our retreat. I really look up to him. The people yg gue really look up to as role models itu adalah dia, Elizabeth Elliot and Ps. Daniel Hanafi πŸ™‚

Nah sebelum retret, gue been asking God for confirmations and His Word for our family. And I got them during retret. And if God says so, I believe it and I will confess it. πŸ™‚ Belon bisa cerita detailnya karena belon saatnya hehehe.

Waktu di retret, ada beberapa hal yg dibagiin Ps. Jonathan David yg bikin nemplak and juga bikin nguatin. Salah satunya yg nemplak adalah ini, he was saying, sekarang dia udah ga pernah doa buat dirinya sendiri. Udah ga pernah lagi request God for this for that. It is actually an insult to God if he prays that way because God has supplied all his needs all along. Buat apa dia doain his needs lagi padahal dia udah tau Tuhan bakal sediain segala kebutuhannya. Tanpa dia harus kasih tau Tuhan, Tuhan udah tau and sudah siapin the best for him. So that’s why he has stop praying for his own needs. I was like, “wow!! bener juga ya! Kalo dipikir2 that is a total trust in God!” Gue mao nyampe to that kind level of faith hehe. I want that kind of faith!

And instead of praying for our own needs, we can focus on praying for others and supaya kita keep walking in His will. Disitu kita juga bisa jadi lebih sensitif ama suara Tuhan buat orang2 yg kita doain itu. And bisa nguatin mereka, membangun mereka, even juga suara Tuhan bisa bikin mereka kembali ke jalan yg benar. Kita jadi accurate.

And we also have to stop reasoning in our heart and mind. When we have received the word of God for us, for our condition, we just need to receive it. Ga perlu lagi bertanya2, or beralasan. Ga perlu lagi ngomong, “tapi Tuhan, ini kan begini, ini kan begono”. We must learn to stop that kind of reasoning. Manusia kan suka gitu, suka cari2 alasan knapa hal ini ga mungkin, lebih sering mikirin faktor2 yg ga mungkin dari pada the Word of God yg udah bilang bahwa itu MUNGKIN. Saat kita menerima the Word, just receive, believe it and act as you have already own it. πŸ™‚ No more question asked.

And how do u know if it’s truly the Word of God for u? Yah bakalan di confirm again and again, sampe u have that strong conviction, beyond any doubt that it is for u.

If we do faithfully what God wants us to do, we will receive God’s promise dengan cepat. But if kita setengah2, ya that promise bakalan ke delay. Karena we are not ready to receive the promise. Karena Tuhan has the right to test you and your heart to see if you are ready to receive the blessing. Lets see some example, misalnya Tuhan udah promise us financial blessings. Kita udah receive his Word but then our financial terbengkalai, kita kurang bisa ngatur keuangan, maybe some of us even ga berani perpuluhan or persembahan, atau pelit dalam blessing others. Sering menggerutu saat keuangan cekak, sering ngomel2 sama Tuhan. Ya itu artinya kita belon siap menerima financial blessing. Karena dengan uang sedikit aja, kita ga bisa ngatur, ga bisa bersyukur sama Tuhan, apalagi kalo dikasih uang banyak. Bisa2 lupa sama Tuhannya. Kalo dari kecil aja belon bisa setia ama Tuhan, apalagi kalo dikasih gede.

Another example, I’m pretty sure banyak pembaca yg baca blog gue pada lagi doain pasangan idup. And maybe some of u udah nerima the promise of God, tapi knapa kok PHnya ga dateng2. Yah ga hanya the other side lagi dipersiapin, u are also being shaped and prepared. Artinya kalian lagi disiapin. Berarti belon siap. Kalo belon siap ya ga bakalan dateng2 tuh PH. Kalo u keep asking, “mana Tuhan, kok lamaaaaa pangerankuuuuuu!!!” terus suka ngomel2 ama Tuhan, ya artinya dikau belon siap wwkkwkwk. You are ready when u are secure, ga kebakaran jenggot karena kok ga ada cowo yg deketin. You are ready when u feel content being single, when u know u can trust your God to bring the one when it’s His time. And the thing is we dunno His time, so yah nyantai aja chasing your calling. πŸ™‚ And if u are still below 20 years old, jangan maksa Tuhan minta PH sekarang deh. Jelas2 belon siap oiiii πŸ˜› Jadi buat abg abg yg baca blog ini, harap tunggu dengan sabar yaaaaaaaaa. And please stop watching sinetron/drama Korea/Jepang and sebangsanya. Itu hanya membuat kalian lebih pingin punya cowo yg bisa sayang2in kalian. Those kind of movies just feeding your flesh and emotion, not your spirit. Mending juga nonton pidatonya Jokowi Basuki.. *loh*… jauh lebih entertaining wkkwkwkkw πŸ˜›

Ok deh, now time to What I wanna do before 40‘…

1. Nulis buku.

Nah ini mah Tuhan bawa secara luar biasa. Dari sekedar nulis blog asal2an, sampe akhirnya bisa nulis buku. And, dari dulu gue tau salah satu my calling is to write books. And waktu taon 2006 an, gue bilang sama Tuhan, gue ga bakalan nyari2 publisher dengan kekuatan gue sendiri. I said to God, I know it’s your timing when a publisher comes to me. Eh beneran tiba2 taon 2011, ada salah satu publisher came to me, asked me to do editing for his books, then tiba2 juga, ga lama kemudian dia nawarin if I want to publish my books with him wkkwkwk. So rencananya taun depan gue mo publish my first book. Tapi masih RENCANA. AHEuAHEuAHEA. Ini ga ada waktu buat nulis oi. Btw bukunya itu ttg ‘How I know he is the one from God’.. lebih diulas dengan detil gitu disono. RENCANANYA.. wkwkkwkw.

Nah I believe after this book, juga akan ada buku2 yg laen. What I sense sih ttg womanhood. We’ll see deh. Β What I need now is just time to write wkkwkw. But now, I dun have the luxury, to have the time to think and write my first book.

2. Bikin Project Life.

Ini gue udah naksirrrrr bgt sejak ngeliat Project Life. What is it? Ini kayak pages of your life in pictures and words. Buat jelasnya, liat pics below. Ini gue bikin for our family… jadi ada a few pages buat bulan Jan, berapa pages buat bulan Feb. Terserah gue sih.

Yah something like that lah. And so far gue baru bikin 4 pages.. wkwkkwkwk. Jadi maunya bikin all the months, then nanti beginning of next year bisa di print, and dijadiin buku. Yup, that is called Project Life. Google aja, ada banyak kok yg bikin.

And gue juga masih utang yg taun 2011, belon bikin sama skali. That’s why I need TIMEEEE!!!

3. Gue skarang dah jadi CEO sebuah company. Company gue sendiri sih. AEhuAEHUAEHuAE Gaya banget. Gak lah, ini aslinya mimpinya si G, and akhirnya jadi my dreams too. Thru this company, we believe lots of things will happen and salah satunya memang our calling. To bless nations. Lebih jelasnya, nanti aja. Kalo udah saatnya kita bakal cerita wkwkkw. Nah before I’m 40, I believe we will go to nations thru this company. And even this company name pun kita dapet dari Tuhan. G dapetnya sejak taon 2000an kalo ga salah. Sebelom ketemu gue.

And kapan company ini jadi? Baru kemaren kita dapet approval and finally company kita registered.. AHEUAHEuAHEuAE. Yg lucunya, kita mau register the name kan, eh ditolak di websitenya, katanya too similar with other company yg udah pake nama itu. Trus ternyata kita bisa appeal and give reason knapa kita mau pake nama itu. Then G dengan pe-denya, bilang… “say, tulis aja gini di websitenya”…

so u know what we wrote in the government website?

We wrote: ‘There is a history, purpose and God’s dream behind this name’. HAHAHHAHA. Udah gitu doank, and we submit our company application. Can u imagine nulis gituan di government website for a company registration? Singapore lagi, yg notabene law nya very strict wkwkkw.

And kata websitenya, company registration process bisa sampe 2 minggu buat approval. Eh ternyata besoknya kita dah dapet approval and our company name is registered wkwkkwk. And kita saling salaman. G said to me “congrats ya ma’am, u are now a CEO”, and I said to him, “congrats too, u are now a Director” AHEuAHEuhAEaE.. πŸ˜›

Yep now it’s just two of us. But before we are 40, we know that it will get bigger and we will reach nations! πŸ™‚

Nah my dream is, by next year, kira2 Feb-Maret, gue berhenti kerja and fokus on this and the mission fields yg gereja bakal percayain ke kita.

4. Bible skul

Nah ini kadang2 gue pingin tapi kadang2 mikir juga, apa gue sanggup yah skolah lagi hAUEhuAEHuAE. Kadang2 otak ini buat skolah udah agak males kayaknya kwkwkwk. Gue tuh tertarik bgt blajar the custom, culture of the people in the Bible. Jadi gue bisa lebih ngerti why the Word was given to them etc. The background lah. It is very important to know sih to understand the Bible better.

5. Berkembang biak

AHEUhaEUaUEhaueh lah iya lah. Masa Aiden ga punya adik. Pinginnya punya 5 anak wkwkkw. Tapi sebenernya gue males hamil. Cape lah hamil segitu banyak. Jadi ya pinginnya adopsi aja. Si G itu pernah bilang, “kalo gitu kita adopsi anak africa yah!” wkkwkwk. Yah maksudnya kita berkembang biak adalah, anak kita banyak. Not necessary our own flesh n blood, but we know kita bakal invest in many kids’ lives.

6. Human trafficking

Hmmm, gue itu kebeban banget ama yg namanya Human Trafficking. Especially yg dijadiin sex workers. Either women or children. I dunno how God will use me in that area. Maybe lebih ttg providing restoration for them, building them etc. But gue bener2 GREGETAN to the core of my soul and my spirit kalo udah mengenai hal ini.

Gue pernah nonton mini-series judulnya ‘Human Trafficking’. Gue nonton itu nangis terus, karena yes, it struck my heart and spirit. Β When I watched the movie, my hatred to the devil arose again. When I watched the movie, I kept saying to myself “oh my god, this is my old enemy…” It sounds familiar, it smells familiar. Yah mungkin gue ga sampe di kidnap, then dijual di luar negeri buat dijadiin sex worker/slave. But I know how that feels, I know how it felt serving someone for sex. And it hurts. I can’t imagine women, apalagi children di kidnap, dijual and dijadiin sex workers, itu rasanya gimanaaaaaaa mannn! So that’s why my spirit bener2 ke stirred up kalo ttg ini. I always feel deep down that I know I can do something, but ga tau apa. Tuhan masih belon bukain.

Apalagi human trafficking is a big business, involves mafia, corrupted police etc. So, ya gue ga tau gimana, but yg gue tau skarang, my spirit says that I might go that way one day. And I pray before I’m 40, gue dipersiapin Tuhan lebih lagi and we as a family will minister to this area. Somehow… πŸ˜€

Hmm, I guess that’s it so far. Sekarang umur gue 34, so I guess I have 6 years for all the above? wkkwkwk.

29 Responses to “What I wanna do before 40”


  1. 1 Anonymous October 4, 2012 at 5:23 pm

    owww, project life ??? itu 10 things before 30 nya aku deh… wkwkwkwkwkkw samaan kit *tossss*
    eh, soal stop counting age after 30, itu bener yah.. hihihihihi

  2. 3 marla123 October 4, 2012 at 8:03 pm

    Nel, Nel. Elo ye, selalu mengingatkan gue akan impian-impian gue dalam Tuhan yang lama (yg dreambooknya udah gak tahu kependem di mana deh), yang sekarang udah ketumpuk rutinitas keseharian dan rasa capek.

    Now, if only I can find…apa ya impian dari Tuhan dulu? Bingung gue hahahaha

  3. 5 widya October 4, 2012 at 9:47 pm

    jadi berapi2 abir bc postingan yang ini. Sngt2 diberkati. Thx for share ci.

  4. 7 Caren October 4, 2012 at 11:28 pm

    No share button? :/
    This blogpost really inspiring, Oh my… How I love ur writing, please keep writing πŸ™‚

  5. 10 Shinta Poulsen October 5, 2012 at 2:43 am

    Ahh loe bikin project life juga!!! πŸ˜€ It’s an amzing project. I love it so much! Buat tahun 2013 ntar gw rencananya mo pake project life yg asli. Asyikkk!!!

    Btw, berkembang biak?? hahahahhaa gubraks deh bahasanya! πŸ˜› Congrats on becoming a CEO of your new venture!! =D

    • 11 nelotte October 5, 2012 at 9:13 am

      wah project life yg asli??? wkkwkkww. Gue sih lebih naksir ama yg digital, lebih sesuai dengan my taste wkkwkw. Yg asli kayaknya ribet buanget. πŸ˜›

      Congrats juga for Nerdy Scrappers! Never knew u are such a gifted tukang gambar wkkwkwkwk love ur drawings πŸ˜€

      • 12 Shinta Poulsen October 5, 2012 at 12:44 pm

        Justru yg asli jauhhhhh lebih gampang, Nel. Kalo beli kitnya dari si Becky Higgins (she is the creator of Project Life), udah ada folder, plastic cover, and journaling cardsnya. Plastic coversnya udah ada pocket2 gitu. Jadi all you need to do is masuk2in journaling cardsnya ke pocket plastic covernya, trus tinggal ditulis2in. Abis itu tinggal masuk2in fotonya ke. Asli gampang buanget. Of course, yg loe google2 and liat ngejlimet2 itu yach emang orang2nya aja yg super duper creative hahaha And si journaling cards yg dari Becki Higgins itu udah bagus2, jadi qta gak perlu pusing hias2 lagi πŸ˜€

      • 13 nelotte October 5, 2012 at 12:51 pm

        HAEUhAUEhauEH nah ituuu gue yg malessss!!! Males nulis2, trus print poto2nya. Lagian tulisan gue jelek buanget HAHAHHAHA. Jadi mendingan gue bikin di Photoshop, ngedesign2 sendiri, since itu udah like my flesh and blood HAUEhUAEHUAHEAE. πŸ˜›

  6. 14 desi October 5, 2012 at 10:43 am

    WOW kerennnnn pas bngt timingnya sama ogut yang udah kepala 3.. xixixixiiiii
    what such a blessing baca blog kamu…
    may God bless u and family abundantly.. πŸ™‚

  7. 16 kezia October 5, 2012 at 12:59 pm

    Cici… yg no 4 itu sama kaya aku.hehehe. aku juga kepengen bangeed buat semacam study bible gituu.. tauu bible dengan lebih mendalam. belajar sejarah-nya dsb.. cuma yaa itu aku nggak yakin bangeeed kalo harus kuliah teologi yang 4 tahun gtuuu. ini ajaa uban dahh nambah gara2 s2.hahahahaha..

  8. 18 Ivon October 5, 2012 at 8:04 pm

    Ayo ci push terus diri sendiri spy beneran buku bs kelar d terbit nxt year yah. U can do it! Hehe ntar samaan kyk ccku jg terbitin buku tuh. Novel sih dia. Hehe u shld buy! (loh jd promosi).

    Ciiiii r u not coming to our wedding?

    • 19 nelotte October 8, 2012 at 9:25 am

      iya i know about ur cici’s novel wkkwkwk. She asked me for the girl’s point of view wkwkwk.

      Iya non, sorry ga bs dateng for ur wedding nih. Congrats yaaaa, soon-to-be-mrs wijaya, we still remember how u guys met in Summer Mission wkwkkwkwkw πŸ™‚

  9. 20 Dina (@d_n4) October 8, 2012 at 5:01 pm

    Wah..ci..ku udah tdk bisa comment apaΒ² baca blog cc..sepiceles beuratz..reminding bgtz..dan beberapa yg cc tulis, memang aku lagi alamin jg & aku lagi fokus terutama di bagian:

    1. Pray for others
    Ngerasain bgtz Tuhan lagi perbesar kapasitas di bagian ini. Meski masih egapΒ²an wkwkwk..but it’s ok..kudu training hard πŸ˜€

    2. Human trafficking
    Nah klo bagian ini ku starting aku udah ngerasain sjk Feb lalu ketika Babe tercinta nyuruh aku ke anakΒ² jalanan di daerah Manggarai. Tuhan masih latih aku, udah practise 3x tp masih hal kecil sih ci. Trus kmrn pas woman conff, wkt tu Patricia King dtg ke Indo, di hari ke 2nd full bahas about this khususnya anakΒ² di Thailand. Ku udah mewekΒ² aje kerjaannya. Klo Tuhan berkenan akhir tahun, akan ada anakΒ² jalanan lagi yang akan dilayani. I still pray for this.

  10. 22 echa October 10, 2012 at 11:43 am

    waaah kak ayolah disempetin nulis bukunyah, bawa2 laptop aja kemana2 kak, pas nunggu bus ato apa gitu kan ad wktu ksgnya nah smbil nulis gitu…hehehe maksa ==’

    aaand itu yg bikin company keren amat masukin statement bgitu hahahaha, panteslah lgsg kluar approvalnya, penuh urapan soale statementnyah πŸ˜€

    oh iya thx for sharing yg didpt dri Dr Jonathan David kak hhehe πŸ˜€

    • 23 nelotte October 10, 2012 at 4:23 pm

      wkkwkw laptop gue rusak n lagian mana bisa bikin buku dengan cara yg loe suggest. Butuh konsen tinggi dirumah and sambil berdoa karena butuh revelation buat nulis kwkwkkww.

  11. 24 mega October 12, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    Berapa bulan yang lalu aku dikasih temen buku yang judulnya Christian Atheis, baru aja sempat baca, dan menemukan namamu di sana…Huaaa….^^ Keren banget ya bukunya Ci Nel. I’m so blessed dah d^^b Hayuk dirimu segera tulis buku sendiri, rela deh daku jadi bagian promonya ^^


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